Choices, Habits and 'Oh Face' Moments

It's not fair but choices you make when your 14 affect you when you're 40. I say it's not fair because what in the world do you know about life when you're14? Certainly not enough to make good choices. Your brain isn't even fully developed and connected when you're fourteen. Doctors say that happens around 20.

I remember counseling one young man who was in his senior year in college. He was having a bit of a pity-party about how difficult life is and how unprepared he was to make the decisions ahead of him. Career, marriage and everything else that was coming his way left him feeling overwhelmed and I couldn't blame him. Not really. He had a lot of book knowledge and not a lot of practical skills.

As we discussed his options I told him that two hundred years ago he would have started college at the age of 14 and could read and write in at least three different languages. It would be a privilege to go to college because it would mean not having to apprentice at a job requiring hard labor. Not only that but if I threw him out in the acreage behind the college he would have been able to build a shelter and forage for food without using his father's credit card or going to Burger King. I asked him what he thought the difference was between the 14 year old 200 years ago and the 22 year old man he was. He thought for a long time and then said softly, "I have never worried about my survival.... I have been given everything." That was an "Oh face" moment. You know the look of knowledge that comes over someone as they say "Ohhhh" and they see something clearly for the first time. As a counselor, I live for 'Oh face' moments.

I had my own 'Oh face' moment today. I hobbled out to get my mail and I saw an envelope with a return address I didn't recognize. The envelope had a computer generated address label on it and it looked like some cheesy graphics on computer paper. I immediately thought I was being solicited for donations and wondered who wanted me to give them some money. Boy was I surprised to find that an older couple from my church had sat at their computer and made me a get well card.

Suddenly I was touched at the time and effort that they would put into personalizing a card for me. I was also ashamed of myself. So ashamed that I didn't want to go to church and see this lovely couple for fear there would be a neon light shining above my head flashing "She is so cynical and jaded she thought you wanted money from her." It has become very clear to me that God has placed me in this family of believers to teach me how to be loved. I am not very good at it.

The choice that I made as a child to keep everyone at arms distance isn't serving me well at 50. It makes me wonder what other habits I have that aren't serving me well. God made us creatures of habit and when our habits are good it works for us. When they are bad, it works against us. I wonder what else is lurking under the surface that I need to deal with? I will leave it to Him to show me.

Daniel 2:22 22 "It is He who reveals the profound and hidden things; He knows what is in the darkness, and the light dwells with Him. (NAS)

Character Flaws, Sin and Remediation

I have been thinking about my last post in which I offered to talk about how having a job has shown or magnified my character flaws. Before I do though, I want to distinguish between character flaws and sin. My character flaws predispose me to sin in certain areas more readily than in others. Indulging in my character flaws is sinful. Entertaining the idea of indulging my character flaws is sinful. They are the weaknesses in me where my flesh makes itself known by screaming, "You know you want to!!" Too often I hear Christians lamenting that they "make mistakes" or are victims of their genetic make-up and intimate that they should, therefore, be excused from culpability for being prone to certain activities. Our cultural dependence on a medical model to define our behavior has given many what they see as a plausible excuse for sin. I don't see that caveat in the Word. For Christians, the Word is always our standard. It is the standard by which all will be j

Fear Down, Hope and Peace to Go!

Last night I had the honor and privilege to present some information to the women of my church. I cannot begin to tell you how much I love and appreciate them. The seminar I did was on fear. God is clever and He had me present the information to them because I needed it. It's not that I don't want to study things for my own benefit and growth, but whenever I do a topical study to teach it, I see how badly I needed it and how much more I have to repent of than I realized. Sometimes you don't know what you don't know. That's a topic I want to return to in another post. I want to talk about the ladies for a moment. They are an incredibly loving group of women. Women who seek God and are teachable. They have gone out of their way to include me and love on me, which speaks volumes of their characters because I am not all that lovable. I am not being self-deprecating here. I am a mix of endearing and maddening qualities like anyone else. What I am telling you is

Super Church a song for the Emergent-sy

In the early 70s I was in a youth choir at my church. Our youth pastor was a musician and his way of connecting with us as a group was through the choir and music. Somehow there was an affiliation between him and The Continental Singers, New Hope and Jeremiah People. He was worked with Moishe Rosen of Jews for Jesus too, I think. Are any of these names familiar to you? Though I remember the church fondly I was a profoundly lost and troubled young woman during my years there. That and time have muddled the memories quite a bit. Today I was digging through some old paperwork and one of the books to the musical we did. It's Getting Late For the Great Planet Earth, a folk rock oratorio by Cam Floria. Yes, that's right. Cam Floria put Hal Lindsey to music. There's a lot to laugh about and some to groan about but as I was looking through the songs and remembering, I found this little ditty and I only wish I could sing it for you. Just remember that this is circa 1972 and even th

rambling rosemarie

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